Being human

This being human is a guest house.Every morning a new arrival.A joy, a depression, a meanness,some momentary awareness comesas an unexpected visitor.Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably.He may be cleaning you out For some new delight.The dark thought, the shame, the malice,meet them at the door laughing,and invite them in.Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sent as a guide from the beyond.
            -Rumi-

Imitating Women

Abu Hurairah (radi Allahu anhu) reported that once a eunuch, who had coloured his hands and feet with henna, was brought to the Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam). The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) asked who this person was. People told him that he imitates women. The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) ordered that he be exiled from Madinah.” [Abu Dawud]Ibn Abbas narrated that the Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) cursed the men who adopt the looks of women, and the women who adopt the ways of men; and that he asked us to throw them out of our homes. [Bukhari]It is clear from the above Ahadith that the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) utterly disliked men who wear ladies clothes and behave effeminately, as well as women who wear men’s clothes and behave like men.The Islamic Shariah has given separate and specific commands to men and women for governing themselves which are sensible and in harmony with their natures. But today, we choose not to follow the Shariah of Islam. Instead, we follow the models provided to us by non-believers. We blindly adopt their fashion and dresses and, in doing so, consider ourselves modernized and respectable, even if such behavior brings us the curse and displeasure of Allah. May Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) give us the wisdom and courage to follow the guidance of His beloved Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam). Whatever Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) and His Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) have given us is entirely for our own benefit.

Musk or Charcoal? - You decide

What the Eyes don't see...be careful

Great advice. One we all forget and do without even raising an eye lid.

With media via sit coms and soaps full of rife with this type behaviour,  what are we learning when we are in front of the old box?  PLUS if in the company of people who engage in this, advise and if it still doesn't impact them then move away from them.

Musk or Coal...what smell do you prefer?

The Best Deed of Women

The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “The best deed of the women of my Ummah is contentment and withdrawal from men.” [Shara’i Hijab]Contentment and withdrawal from men are linked. Contentment with whatever Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) has bestowed on one is required in order to keep away from mingling with men. Why does the need to unnecessarily mingle arise? It arises out of a desire for the things of this world. What are the attractions of this world? They are money (the luxuries and recreation it buys) and fame. We really need to ask ourselves how much shopping and recreation is necessary. After all, isn’t there an eternity in Jannah for this? When it comes to work, we need to ask ourselves whether it is to fend off starvation or to maintain a certain standing in society by being associated with a particular career.For a woman to fully guard herself from the eyes of men she needs to keep her focus on the ocean of Akhirah and suppress her desires for this drop of a world. If she can rein in her desires for the things of this world, she will not feel the need to go out so much.

Eeman is like an airplane ride, the higher up you go, the smaller the things of this world seem. When my Eeman is high enough the things of this world will become invisible to me and I won’t notice what others are wearing and showing off, let alone want them for myself. But till I get to cruising altitude I’ll be burning a lot of fuel. It’s hard work, but the burning fuel is another name for Taqwa: the more I have of it, the higher my level in Jannah, inshaAllah.

Saudi Arabia bride demands groom marry her friends | GulfNews.com

Saudi Arabia bride demands groom marry her friends | GulfNews.com

E - Man or He Man?

What do you do when no matter how much you try to do good actions it is never enough from those around you. 

I never thought the day would come where my own flesh and blood would hang me up to dry making comments and judgements about my deen and saying it's pointless learning as I am not practicing. Other members of my family making grave calls about my actions being a means to "killing" my dear mother.  I can't write anymore as it hurts thinking about this.

The last few months have been a real challenge.  My wife went into labour  two months ago and delivered our first born after an emergency cesarean which followed by a further operation within a space of a week. Wife and baby remained in hospital for two weeks and I went in everyday staying on occasions sleeping on a make do chair. 

Further more having come back home after a few weeks my fathers health deteriorated.  He failed to talk freely which after a few weeks progressively became worse.  Even with me having a new baby to deal given my wifes recovery from 2 operations, it was again me taking full care of my father even when other siblings where around.  It was I who notified the Gp got the rapid response team involved to check dad out day in day out for over a week now. 

Whilst all this was going on. In parallel mum was also unwell and she mentioned chest pains to my siblings. And then after mentioning to me on one occasion which due her history I immediately called the gp and furthermore notified emergency services.  In summary she experienced heart failure and its almost two weeks that she remains in hospital.   I have been going almost everyday to visit her and speaking to the a doctor's about the status of her condition.

Yet with all this going on I have also tried to look for a job as I my role was made redundant over 3 months ago.  I have been getting very little support upto now and really been trying to support others new baby wife mother and father.  Also keeping my eyes on maintaining the home keeping up to date with the shopping and bills which I am fully responsible for getting absolutely no support from those siblings working.

With all this going on my siblings still have the nerve to say I am not doing enough for my parents.   Making astonishing comments and holding me to a barrell reminding me of sins I have done over 20 years ago as a means of playing ball.

Now what do I do my faith is dwindling.  I continue to pray and read Qur'an and attend lectures and courses.  But now feel really disheartened and very disappointed with my siblings.  Feel my emaan is taking a dive and I am reaching out to anyone a cry of help this you may say...

20th Dhul Hijjah 1432 (Wednesday 16th November 2011)

The day of our departure from Makkah to London, It was a sad day in many ways. We were leaving the sacred land to go back to the lives we have left behind. Our lives here on will never be the same again. Some of the changes I have thought about during Tawwaf, taking the time out during my stay.

I woke up at 4.30am and read Fajr at the Harem for the last time at 5.11am Akluma and I made our Tawwaf al Widaa (Farewell Tawwaf) taking just over an hour on the middle floor. It was rather emotional leaving this blessed city. We went back to the hotel to pack for the last time after we had breakfast with the Swansea crew table. Once we prayed dhuhr at the Harem we boarded Coach #3 and were ready to depart. Brother Mustafa found Aklumas backpack in the reception foyer, and Alhamdullillah located us with this bag. I did leave my own bag and my book “The Road to Mecca – by Mohammed Asad” on the coach to Jeddah airport ironically.

The journey to London, was fairly easy and comfortable (as much as it can be on a BMI chartered flight). Most people were not feeling too well and the a/c in the airbus did not help one bit. This later had the ramification of Hajjis collecting the luggage and saying salaams as quick as one could say “Hajji Tariq”!!!
Our Zamzam, the one I purchased through Al Muntada, went missing, never to be found. Alhamdulillah there was a previous flight were few zamzams were not redeemed and the lost property office at T1 provided me with one 10kg crate of zamazam.

Neha was there waiting outside on arrivals, we must have been one of a very few coming out at 1.15am! We were tired but Alhamdullillah I so wanted to see my bed to get some much needed sleep. I am so glad I did not have to go into work the next few days. My throat was painful, and the cough well, it was only bringing up flem that I must hasten to add was not the most pleasing on the eye. These symptoms persisted for another week.

My mother was so proud we did not lose any footwear! Well she was pleased for my wife for sure that she did not have to use the women’s Hamams at the Harems in Medinah and Makkah.

I write this looking back at my days. The more I write on each day journal of my journey, the more I long to be at the Harem, to the sacred land that Allah swt has made for us in this World. Subhana’Allah.
I ask Allah to forgive me for any mistakes I may have made during this Hajj journey, Ameen. May Allah accept the Hajj of Akluma and I, the Hajj of my Mother In Law and Brother in Law, the Hajj of the Hujjaj of Al Muntada and all the Hujjaj from all over earth.

19th Dhul Hijjah 1432 (Tuesday 15th November 2011)

The day of packing, this was the item on the menu for all of Al Muntada Hajjis. There was luggage all around the 3rd floor, where we resided.

All the couples were doing all what they can to fit all what they have purchased into their luggage bags. I must say I was not too fussed as with an allocation of 30kgs it would be difficult to go much over this and we had a taste of this from our travels to the Far East earlier in the year and this was with 23kg each.

In the evening after Esha and tawwaf at the Harem on the roof once more, Akluma and I went to see her mother and her dulabhai for the last time in Saudi. We managed to see her mother as dulabhai appeared to be awol. Nevertheless it was sad saying goodbye.

18th Dhul Hijjah 1432 (Monday 14th November 2011)

We were originally planning to perform Ummrah today after Fajr however we both were not feeling well.

We hit the souks in “misfala” after asr prayer once we had some proper home cooked Bangladeshi fish and rice at our favourite joint now – Asia Restaurant.
We performed another nafl tawwaf after Esha which was better on the roof. This was followed by much needed mango slush from the zamzam towers.

Our bodies were feeling the tiredness by now, which did not help from our constant coughs which were aided by the a/c all over the 4* hotel. These mod cons are a hazard I must say and many a time I try to switch this off in my room.